Beyond Politics

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omewhere in 2000, right after he swore in as chief minister of Goa, Manohar bhai penned down his thoughts on his life before and after the passing away of his beloved wife Medha

The Raj Bhavan hall was filled with party workers. The Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) was coming to power for the first time in Goa. Enthusiasm was flowing. 

My closest friends and activists from different parts of Goa were present for my swearing-in ceremony as chief minister of Goa for the first time in 2000. The people, with whom I entered politics, my colleagues, well-wishers, party workers, etc. were all present. With them, I saw my two sons, my sisters and brothers in the crowd. Still, the picture in front of me was incomplete. My wife and parents were missing. 

I was remembering them vividly. I was delighted that whatever I had never imagined had become a reality, but that happiness had a touch of sadness. How destiny plays with life! Within the space of a year, these people who were so close to me had left permanently. No one could have filled the vacuum they left. Their sheer presence used to give me strength and inspiration. 

On one hand, the BJP was enjoying power for the first time in Goa, while on the other, I was grieved that my parents and wife, who would have shared this joy with me, were missing not only in the hall but also from this world. Today, they would have been the happiest of all and I am feeling their absence. During my responsibilities in the Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh (RSS), they were with me all the time. I had an unexpected entry into politics. I was able to fulfill new responsibilities because they always supported me. While taking the oath as chief minister, I was hoping they would be present. Now, my real political journey had started. During this important phase, the ones who ought to have been there with me were missing.

Often, we take for granted the people who are close to us. I used to think that Medha was mine, she would not leave me and go anywhere else, that she would be with me forever. But that does not happen. Things happen suddenly and you do not know what to do, or for that matter, there is nothing in your hands. This is what happened in Medha’s case. 

Her illness progressed rapidly. In a short span of time, the disease took her away from us, permanently. Our lives were progressing smoothly. No one had envisaged that something like this was going to happen.

I distinctly remember those days. About 15 years had passed since our marriage. My daily schedule had become very busy as on one hand, I had to manage the increased work load of the factory and on the other, the new responsibilities of politics. Our party was close to attaining power in the state. 

In the meantime, Medha had been experiencing fever for a few days. For many days, she bore the pain. I was too busy to take her to the doctor. I advised her to take someone from the family with her to see the doctor. 

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